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Privileged.

They placed him on my chest. Gooey and purple, I still was not sure what to do with him. Do I touch him? Who is this little boy? How do I feel about this? When do I wake up?

I kind of laughed and looked at Luke and said it still felt like I was dreaming. Since October I felt like I was in a dream. Just before I gave birth even I had to look down and try to let it sink in that I was pregnant and going to have a baby.

And then there he was and I was stumped. They took him away and cleared his throat and checked his vitals. And then it hit me.

I missed him.

I wanted him back with me. I needed to have my baby. My little boy. When were they going to bring him back to me? {I am crying a bit now as I write this because I still miss him when he is not with me. As a matter of fact, he is sleeping on my chest now as I type this blog.}

I have spent the last nine months thinking about how I have to go through all the baby trials again. All the diapers and no sleep and chasing around. The idea of all that work again terrified me. But I have met Will now and he is worth everything. I will happily do it all over again for him. My mind has gone from feeling fear over the work to feeling privileged that I get to do the work. Yes, I feel privileged that God gave me another child to love and raise. I am gaga over Will.

William Patrick – Born July 9th – 8lbs. 14 oz. (you feel me, ladies?!) – 20 inches – Wonderful!

I could go on and on about this new special little boy, but I will spare you and get right to some photos. I snapped these images just before we left the hospital. Little Will, less than two days old…

Waiting for Will…

There were two of us at my pity party this morning (2.9 if you count Will – still in my tummy!).

Today is July 6th. Today is my due date. Today at my doctor appointment the doctor said that I have not progressed towards delivery. Today she said that she will not schedule an induction because I am still not far enough along. Today I was trying not to cry at the appointment desk as I made another appointment for next week.

I have been waiting for this day since October. And I have been thinking of nothing else but being not pregnant anymore for the last month. I will not force you to attend my pity party too by going over details with you, but this last month of pregnancy has been one of the most uncomfortable times of my life, and never did I think that I would still be pregnant on this day, July 6th. And never did I think that the Doctor would say that I should make a 41-week appointment for next week!

So I came home from my appointment and sat at the table with Luke and cried. And felt sorry for myself. And he listened and stayed home from work and was the amazing husband that he always is. And now I feel better. And ready to meet Will. Oh so ready!

Luke suggested we go for a walk after our party. Bella looked at us and said, “We can go for a walk but mama should stay home and rest because her feet are too fat.” Out of the mouths of babes. Yes, I have been having some severe swelling problems this last month and walking has not been easy. I can only wear one pair of my shoes at the moment. I think that I will have some sort of shoe-burning party after my body returns to normal. I wonder how well these beauties will burn…

Too Excited!

So, this may be the fastest post ever from me {You know I can get a little long-winded}. I just bought some new baby announcement card templates and I had to share a couple of them with you as they are SOOOOO cute!

I know that you have seen these images already, but as I only had a second to do this I just grabbed a few favorite recent newborn images.

I am so excited to use these for my own baby announcements in July! My little Will {yes, it’s a boy!} will be here soon…

Front of card one:

Back of card one:

Front of card two:

Back of card two:

Shop Talk – Joy

The bubble gum flavor was not unpleasant. It smelled like Bella. And as I was brushing my teeth, I was happily thinking about how grateful I was that when I ran out of my own toothpaste, I had Bella’s pink princess bubble gum toothpaste to fall back on. I love these small joys in my life.

And then I realized something about my photography. About how much joy and gratitude play a role in it. About how, if you cannot find joys in the simplicity of life, you cannot capture them with your camera.

You see, I am a joy junkie. In my shoots, I want to find that joy. I want to get that moment when you let down your guard and let me in and share with me. I crave that.

And I believe that for you to do well with photography {or your other ventures}, you will also need to seek out that joy. You will need to appreciate the small gifts and be patient enough to wait for the big ones. Once you are able to do that, you can relax and let yourself feel those moments. It is hard to describe this feeling, but try it sometime. Try to feel the joys in the task in front of you and I think that your work will change. And so might your life {big statement to throw in at the end of a paragraph, I know}.

I know that you may want some technical advice by now in these shop talks. You know, talk about lenses and light and Photoshop and printing, but that will have to wait for now. Because while these things are incredibly important, learning how to not worry about them is important too.

And just to share two of my joys with you, here are Bella and Abe. Can you feel their joy?

How I got this shot? This is called “panning” and is all about your shutter speed {and patience}. I first determined the correct shutter speed for how much background movement I wanted. Too fast a shutter speed, and the background would not show enough blur. Too slow, and the elements would not have been recognizable. So, play with the shutter speed and check the viewfinder on the back of your camera to determine your personal preference. I was at 1/60 here.

Then you want to be sure that all of your subject is in focus, and that your aperture is not too wide. I was at a 9.5 here. I am never at a 9.5 {I like a very narrow depth of field – i.e. very blurry backgrounds}. However, in this case, I knew that the motion would give me the blur that I needed so I didn’t worry about that. Plus, the swing was moving around so much that I needed to have a very large focal plane so I could catch the kids in focus no matter where the swing took them.

Once you have all of that determined, you then need to move with the subject. Yes, you need to pan! I planted my feet and body so that I would face their resting position directly from the side {Does that make any sense?}. Then when Luke swung them, I kept my feet planted and moved my camera with the kids at their speed.

Finally, you need to take lots of shots. I took over 50 of them swinging to get this one good one. This was especially tricky because you have two kids to look good and have their eyes open and you have a swing that spins, so sometimes I would get a shot of their backs. Remember that whole patience bit?:)

Good luck…